My Barbie Doll Is An Amputee

I was driving home one day last week. I was listening to some radio station, don't remember the name. The female DJ was making announcements of local events. She was telling about a lecture and book signing at the local bookstore, "Carpe Librum". The DJ said that the author giving the lecture would be signing her book called, "My Barbie Doll Was An Amputee". Then the DJ started to laugh....and laugh....and laugh. She would catch her breath and remark how funny the title of the book was. I must admit, I was laughing in my car at the title and her reaction to it. The whole thing got me started thinking about Barbie Dolls and what an icon they had become in our society. Just think, there in a plastic doll, all the illusions and male fantasies are made real. The perfect woman, blonde, blue eyes, always smiling with long legs and big perky boobs. She never complains, never has a headache or a bad hair day. There is no cellulite within 1 miles of her body. Her boyfriend is a metrosexual named Ken who is there only for her needs and the occasional grand ball with the Queen. It's no wonder anorexia is so prevalent among teenage girls.

Here is my tribute to that male fantasy called Barbie. I found some candid Barbie pictures, the pictures she didn't want you to see. There are also a few "family members" Barbie has tried to distance herself from.




Suicide Bomber Barbie - Some guys at MIT came up with this pic. Maybe they need a break from school?











Monica Lewinsky Intern Barbie - You can even buy the stained blue dress if you want. Yuck!!







S and M Barbie - For those days when you just have to have nipple clamps.

Living In The Moment

The Buddhist way of life depends on several simple life principals. Karma or the belief that your actions come back to you. In Karma, everyone pays for what they've done. It may take several lifetimes, but Karma's gonna get you. There's also the principal of reincarnation. A principal in which I believe to a point. Yes, I know everyone's saying, "You're a freak!" Maybe so, but I believe that since we know energy never dies, it only changes forms, that it's possible that the electrical energy in us could survive death of our body. The point is, nobody has ever been able to be dead (and I mean really dead, like brain death) and come back to report on it. So really it's all a guess, isn't it?

Another principal of Buddhist teaching is the principal of "Living in the Moment". It is about tossing aside your worries, your thoughts of what is going to happen later, your plans, your schedule, your regrets and just thinking only of this very moment. A good example of this principal is the life of a child. Like the Namibian children in the picture, living in the moment is about being fully present with no thoughts of anything else. Children are very good at it. But like most things, as children grow, we adults beat any free spiritedness out of them. We teach them about bills and worry, school and worry, success and worry. We shackle their spirits in chains of responsibility and doubt. That's how we become adults.

If you want to know true joy and peace you must learn to live in the moment at least some of the time. You must learn to not wish this moment away in exchange for another. Our lives are lives of "We'll do it tomorrow/next month/two weeks/when I retire". Everyone should try for 10 minutes each day to live in the moment. When you're driving in to work, don't think about what you have to do that day. Take time and notice the trees, the new construction on the corner, your neighbor's new landscaping. This is the way the Buddhist have been de-stressing for millennia and it's proven to work.

The Gospel of Judas Iscariot

Lately you can't sling a dead cat in a bookstore without hitting a magazine or book with some type of Jesus theory. Some say Jesus was married, some say Jesus was alive for long after he was supposed to have died on the cross, and still others say Jesus was more human that previously given credit. I, for one, feel like a kid in a candy store. I love debate about religion, especially when that debate is based on scholarly work or discoveries. I must admit I've grown tired of the debate that comes from "born again" people who tell me that if I don't believe the exact same way as they do then I will go to Hell. When I ask them why should I believe what they say and not what others say, they respond with the equivalent of...."uh, because I said so". This is why I'm so exicited about the announcement of National Geographic about the discovery and subsequent authentication of The Gospel of Judas.

The Gospel of Judas was written by an unknown author in the 3rd century AD. It depicts Judas as Jesus' best buddy. His confidant, friend, and most trusted apostle. In the Gospel, Judas talks with Jesus about the temple elders approaching him to betray Jesus and assist in his arrest. Judas is against it. He doesn't want to do it. Jesus tells him to go through with it. Basically he tells Judas that dying on the cross is the reason for his existence. He tells Judas that he needs this to happen to fulfill the prophecy. Judas does as Jesus wishes but with a heavy heart that engulfs him in sadness and guilt.

I have found many things in the Bible as being contradictory. I have wondered many times, if Jesus was the Son of God and could raise the dead, heal the sick, turn water into wine, then how could he have not known that Judas betrayed him. This book answers that question....and it makes sense. The Gospel also shows Jesus as having more human qualities such as a sense of humor, apprehension about doing his duties, and manipulating circumstances to make the outcome what he wanted.

What many people don't know and the Church does not advertise is that the Bible we all know is a mere sample of all the Gospels that were out there at the time the Bible was created. In about 345AD, the newly converted Emperor Constantine got all the factions of Christianity together. He and a group of trusted elders got together and decided what books would be "cannonized" and what books would be burned. The Christianity we know today is a creation of the Emperor Constantine. He was also responsible for the original foundation principals on which Christianity was built. Among those were the assertion that Jesus was not an ordinary man but the Diety known as the "Son of God". Until that time, there was much debate about whether or not Jesus was a prophet or a deity. Constantine decided the answer for everyone and for all time. Constatine also decreed that a collection of Gospels used by the Gnostic Christians would not be used in the Bible and he ordered them destroyed. A copy of each of these books (coptic texts) was buried in a clay pot in the desert. Left undiscovered for nearly over 1800 years, the Gnostic Gospels were discovered in a village now called Naj Hammadi in 1945. The Gospels are a fascinating glimpse into the different factions of early Christianity. In the collection is the book called "The Gospel of Mary". It is said to be the teachings and story of Mary Magdalene.

What should The Gospel of Judas tell us? It should tell us that there is still much to be learned for those with open minds. As far as I'm concerned, the truth is what God is all about. Why shouldn't we seek the truth out, even if it makes us uncomfortable?

Papaw and Mamaw

As those close to me know, I have lost both my paternal grandparents in the last three months. My papaw couldn't live without mamaw by his side. He went to be with her only a few weeks ago. I still can't grasp it, try though I might. I expect to hear something about them everyday. But there is only silence where their stories used to be. I look at the world and I wonder how it can go on after such a thing. The world is a survivor, always moving forward while the rest of us try to catch up to yesterday. I am a private person so forthright discussion of feelings is rare, especially if those feelings are sadness. But sometimes, rarely, I violate my own rules.

I sit here tonight and wonder if the two of them have found one another yet. Are they together finally? Together without disease, worry, or sadness, just joy. Do they sing the songs to each other that they used to sing to us? I remember the melody, the pitch, the words of every song. I miss them.

I'm A Groupie!!!!!

I'm in love with a man I've never met! His name is Damien Rice, an Irish singer. His music is beautiful and makes me want to cry. When I hear him sing I see Ireland all over again. I feel myself standing at the shores of Cobh.

I have my friend, the Dali, to thank for my latest infatuation. He gave me a CD and told me I just had to hear it. Once I listened, I was hooked forever. The music from the CD is on my home computer, my work computer and my Ipod. One song, Cannonball, is a particular favorite of both the Dali and I. If you like folksie, Irish music, give www.damienrice.com a look.

Things I Hate

10. I hate stupid, skin head, redneck white supremacist.

9. The current White House Administration... Every last crooked one of them.

8. Katie Couric's hairdo. Looking at her really is like looking directly into the sun, wayyyyyy too many highlights.

7. Northerners, not all Northerners, just the few that act like they're doing us a favor by living here.

6. Waking up in a cold house because I forgot to turn the heat on after a warm day.

5. When my mother says, "If I were you......". Boy, do I hate that one.

4. Not being able to think of the name of the person singing that song that's stuck in my head.

3. When my children are sick.

2. DRAMA....I hate drama in work, drama in relationships, drama in everything. Why can't we all just stop playing damn games?

1. I hate most of all the pervasive and all encompassing ignorance of this world. Ignorance of other's religion, lifestyle, culture and values. From this ignorance comes fear and from fear comes hate, war, and violence. I'm not trying to sound like Yoda from Star Wars but it's true and I hate it.