An Open Letter to Jesus

Dear Jesus,

I got some questions. I want to know why you look like W (that's the first question). Of course I want to know why there is war, famine, disease, and hate. Those are heavy questions and if you need time to get back to me, I'll understand.

On the lighter side, what is up with Pat Robertson? Is he really that stupid or does he want free publicity? What about Bill Frist? I know you can't be responsible for that one. Perhaps it is better to accuse the black sheep of the universe for ole Bill. Oh, yeah, Tom Delay, he ain't right. Could you maybe find him a nice little Abby somewhere where he would just leave us all alone? He has some some friends that he owes money to, he would be happy to "disappear".

Lastly, please send a Holy Memo or something to the damn people here in the country and tell them that you didn't send the Hurricanes, let alone use the storms to kill gays. They all forget about that whole "free will" clause in the Holy Contract. They forget that we are responsible for our own actions. They actually think that their agenda is yours.

Well, gotta go get the kids ready for bed now. I look forward to hearing your response.

Deanna